Baby Ava is 5 (nearly 6) weeks old. I can officially say that this is the hardest thing I’ve ever been through in my life. I’ve finally hit the point where I’ve stopped crying the nights that she doesn’t sleep. I’m slowly learning different things she needs/prefers it’s crazy. It truly makes me wonder what kind of personality she will have. I will say this little girl still brings a smile to my face and makes me glad we decided to start having kids.
We for sure want more kids, but not for another couple of years. I look at Ava and know that she needs a sibling…or 3. Hahaha! The first few weeks with Ava were difficult for Zach and me. We definitely our share of fights and just getting irritated with each other. After talking it out amongst ourselves and seeking advice from parents we moved past it. I know it’s not the end of the fights that come up while raising a child, but I feel much better.
I will say that I have a whole new level of respect for single parents and parents in general. I can’t imagine how someone raises children on their own, again I will say they are the real heroes of the world. And parents all the heartbreak that comes with having a child. I’m not there yet, but I look back at my childhood and realize I didn’t make things easy for my parents. I’m thankful for their strictness and I hope I’m half the parent my mother is. Well now I’m off to get this baby to bed since she’s a stubborn one.
Ava is officially 2 weeks old…and I now see how having a baby can cause strain on a relationship. The lack of sleep alone could cause all kinds of problems.
It has been a definite struggle keeping up with Ava’s ever changing schedule. Zach and I have had our first fight which was due to lack of sleep and a crying baby. We talked through it though and I think that things are just harder than we anticipated. Zach has been working 12 hour shifts since he started back at work this week which means we don’t really see him. I was also used to the tag team of things in the middle of the night, I can no longer expect that. So we have to compromise.
Mommy (me) is working to stay on the baby’s schedule. Daddy (Zach) is working to try and work out time to be with us and get adequate sleep. I’m sure someone is asking “what about his days off?” Zach’s job is VERY VERY busy right now which is great for the paycheck, bad for the relationship.
He often works great 10-20 days straight until he gets a day off. He never says no to the overtime, because we need it (who doesn’t these days?). When it gets too much I do tell him to take a day off, but only when I see that he’s practically a zombie going through the motions. I’m beyond thankful and proud of him because up until this week he was working and going to school full time; at one point he was working 2 jobs and going to school full time. Unfortunately due to some unforeseen circumstances, Zach is no longer going to school. It’s okay though, we roll with the punches and I truly believe everything happens for a reason.
I know it’s tough and Zach does too, but at the end of each day we manage to make it to bed with a smile. Every time the baby cries at night, at first it’s a little overwhelming because we just want to sleep, but the second we see her it all seems to melt away. I don’t know, and more importantly I don’t want to know, how people beat/kill their babies. I don’t understand what happens in their mind that makes them snap. I’m just thankful that it’s not like that with us. For sure we want to have more kids, but not right now. At least that’s how I’m feeling while I’m healing still.